Cars Shaped Like Food and Other Time Wasters

The worst multitasking ever: Neglecting client work and chores in favor of learning all about cars shaped like food and the idiots who drive them.

On Sunday night I got back from 10 days in California, where I visited my friend LuAnne and attended the fabulous San Francisco Writers Conference.

Now I’m home, and I’m swamped. Swamped.

Yesterday, I worked on my taxes and compiled conference notes and worked on my novel pitch and reviewed chapters from my talented peers in my advanced novel class and did client work and sent out invoices and prepped for upcoming meetings and considered buying real estate.

Sort of.

See, my brain is full, and according to a friend of mine my post-travel soul has yet to catch up to my body. The brain full thing is unfortunately preventing me from understanding the post-travel soul thing. It’s also preventing me from actually completing any task I start.

To try to jumpstart my brain, I downed a gallon of coffee and did a crossword without cheating (which took exactly 5 hours longer than when I do cheat). I also wished my laundry would do itself (stupid laundry) and repeatedly stared at the contents of the fridge in the hopes that food would materialize. Yesterday I ate corn, dry cereal, and breakfast sausage. (It’s only occurring to me now that maybe I should have hit the grocery store.)

Those taxes aren’t going to do themselves, I thought, as I ate a bowl of corn and read up on London Fashion Week, stars who date non-celebs (so brave!), and cars shaped like food and the idiots who drive them. I also watched the awesome SNL video of Beyonce, Jay-Z, and their baby, Blue Ivy, receiving such visitors as Prince, Nicki Minaj, Taylor Swift, LL Cool J, and Bon Iver. And because I didn’t have so much as a second free, I naturally planted myself in front of the TV and watched two hours of The Voice.

I hope my post-travel soul catches up to my body soon.